Thursday, April 30, 2009

Hand me a kleenex

Members of my immediate family have suffered with seasonal allergies/hayfever for many years. I was never sympathetic towards their suffering. In fact, I was rather annoyed by all their sniffling and sneezing.

Henceforth, I will be sympathetic. I promise.

This tree gunk and pollen is coating my lungs and sinuses! It is making me miserable. My eyes are itchy. And my good ol' nose. Stuffy one minute, runny the next. It's being good to me that way.

So I am off to use my neti pot. Which, I think, is one of the best inventions ever! Seriously. Don't knock it until you try it.

Also.... I could use some sympathy.


Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Hey, look at me!

Sometimes I get the feeling that my husband doesn't look at me.

At work last week, I had I took one of my hoop earrings off in the morning to talk on the phone. I forgot to put it back in and apparently walked around with the pirate look going on all day and NO ONE SAID A THING.

Last evening we went to an awards dinner for his work. He had invited one of his customers and his wife (whom I had never met) to attend with us. All evening I was chatting, laughing, being friendly and trying to make a good impression.

When I got ready to brush my teeth before bed, I noticed that I had the biggest piece of food in between my front teeth. RIGHT THERE. Hello? How could he not NOTICE !!! Ugghhhhh.

So much for good impressions.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Care to join?

I stockpile books. LOTS of them. I have shelves of books that I haven't gotten around to reading. I blame it on Costco because their books are so inexpensive. I really need to start reading them.

I also need to start attending bookclub again. I think bookclubs are the key to making smart, funny and fabulous friends.

But reading all of the afore mentioned books could seriously take my focus off "Amazing Race, "House Hunters" and other tv shows that need my undivided attention.

So maybe I should start a TV club where I could make so-so smart, funny, fabulous friends.

Monday, April 20, 2009

You're so vain

I wonder if I could get a doctor's prescription for a tan?

I couldn't possibly be that shallow, could I? I couldn't possibly,with the economy the way it is, be concerned looking tan, could I?

I wouldn't bet against it.

I miss having a tan.

Remember being tan, all brown and healthy-looking? Remember believing that getting a tan made you look healthy? Laying in the backyard with a bottle of baby oil for your skin and lemon for your hair...

Friday, April 17, 2009

The Power of Words

Today I have been thinking about the power of words.

I love the Sanskrit language because those who formed the language did so with the intention that every sound should be sacred. They believed that sound was the quickest way to the divine.

It saddens me when we use harsh words towards each other and accuse each other falsely. I am reminded of this well-known passage that is wisdom for us all:
"Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man, but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth the man.

So please, let us be kind to each other, and assume only the best of each other's hearts.

Have a good weekend.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Offers you can't refuse

We took a long walk last evening. It proved to be more strenuous than I had anticipated. Not that we are out of shape or anything. It's those darn hills up where we live. Really.

We passed a house that had kid-scrawled chalk on the sidewalk that read "Free Hopscotch" and the squares stretched all the way up the walk.

I tried it. It was fun.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Warm up, please.

I need it to be sandal/flipflop weather already. I haven't got any in-between shoes.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Yell no

Something that really bugs me is yelling across the house to someone instead of just walking to wherever they are and speaking in a nice, even, low voice.

But I do it all the time and annoy MYSELF. Despite my repeated self-reminders to STOP YELLING ACROSS THE HOUSE, I have such a hard time stopping. I'll yell downstairs to hubby to tell him that dinner is ready, shake my head at myself in disgust, and promise myself to STOP. It's just a few extra steps and those extra steps would really make for a much calmer and quieter house. The next evening I'll remember not to yell and instead calmly go downstairs and tell him to come up for dinner. Such a sense of accomplishment! Such a calm! Until the next night when I yell again for him to come for dinner.

It's a vicious, vicious cycle.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

21 is not enough.

It hasn't always been sweet and light.

But it has been sweet.

Happy 21st Anniversary Babe.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Just call me the floss fairy

I'm curious... Do ya'll floss?

I do--religiously--and I'm always equal parts horrified and fascinated at what comes out of my teeth AFTER brushing. Seriously...who knew you could cram THAT MUCH stuff in there?

This past weekend we went out with an assortment of friends for a belated birthday for hubster. Can I just tell you...I saw a disturbing amount of tartar on teeth of random strangers (and a few acquaintances, too). Get thee to a dentist and scrape that crap off before you get gum disease, people!

Good dental hygiene is the cornerstone of my existence. I feel like flying around and handing out dental floss to the whole world. And yes, I know that's a little weird.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Yea, I'll take dying in my sleep

Occasionally our neighbors gather for Friday night dinner and a movie at the clubhouse. There is an older gentleman who attends; he's more than 90 and lives alone and is a bit lonely after his wife died several years ago. He's always in good spirits at these events and basks in the attention of children and adults alike.

At one such party, he started choking on a hunk of meat. Luckily for him, there were several doctors in attendance. One of them Heimliched the man and he was fine again, although those of us who witnessed all of this were shaken.

As the party drew to a close another neighbor said goodbye to him, giggled and noted "Glad you are OK! That would have been an awful way to go, after you have lived this long."

Oh yes, she did.

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Basking at the feet of Prophets

What I learned from General Conference this weekend:

I am nothing.
But I can do anything.
I need to pray with more purpose.
I need to talk about the gospel more.
I need to rededicate myself to my family.
I need to be more adaptable to change.
I need to attend the temple more. (and not rush)
I need to murmur less and be more grateful.
I need to use the atonement more.
I need to be more like Christ.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Second-born, but never second-best

The second one is different and exactly the same.

The second one is harder and easier.

The second one is predictable and surprising.

The second one is more work and less work.

The second one is a thorn in the side of the the first one, and a partner in crime.

The second one is worth it.

Happy Birthday Mr. A. I love you.

Thursday, April 2, 2009

10 commandments of dishwasher use

1. I am the automatic dishwasher; thou shalt not have any other gods before me, and believe that a five-second spin under the faucet is my equal.

2. Thou shalt not take the name of the dishwasher in vain, and curse it for not unloading itself.

3. Remember the dishwasher and keep it holy; thou shalt not run it during the dinner hour.

4. Honor thy father and thy mother, and learn to place your dirty dishes in the dishwasher and not beside the couch.

5. Thou shalt not kill your meltable objects by placing them in the lower rack.

6. Thou shalt not cheat by running the dishwasher when it is not full.

7. Thou shalt not steal space through inefficient loading.

8. Thou shalt not bear false witness by claiming disposable items are meant to be washed and reused. And that includes drinking straws.

9. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's house, if it has two dishwashers instead of one.

10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife, who unloads the dishwasher in a timely manner.

This post may possibly have been inspired by the person in my house with whom I share a dishwasher. Maybe

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

She said I will be pretty in six to eight weeks

Mid February I went to the dermatologist. No, nothing wrong, unless you can count my obsession with the teeny tiny lines around my eyes and over my top lip and the dark patches on my cheeks and my pores OH MY GOSH MY PORES!!!

The dermatologist wrote me out a couple of prescriptions and gave me advice about products and then whipped out a can of liquid nitrogen and froze spot off my hands and legs. Before she did it she explained that for the next week to ten days I will look like crap (scabbing, possible blistering) but then the skin will slough off and heal and NO MORE DARK SPOTS.

And I was so excited about the prospect of perfect skin that I said, " Hey, I'm here, you've got the blow torch out, let's do it!" And she did.

I pointed out the brown spots on my hands and legs to her. Four located on my hands and three on my right leg. Much to my dismay, she saw ALOT more than I. (like 33 more. Yes, I counted). It took over three weeks for these babies to heal.

Now I don't have brown spots all over. I have bright red!! Yea, me and my speckled legs look hott!